Being lazy ...

Being lazy is not good.  I'm currently thinking up any old excuse to not write.  Writing this blog post is one such excuse.  Before that, it was the trolling I was doing on my Facebook page with regards the recent elections.  Then it's typing up the handwritten draft of my current novel, "Maggie's Children".  Then it's research.  Then it's working on the screenplay for "Besotted".  Then it's writing toxic poetry.  Any old excuse to not write.

I'm at that stage with "Maggie's Children" where I was with "Besotted".  I don't think it's good enough, I think the characters are shit, etc etc, but then people told me "Besotted" was a very good book, so I guess I may well just be suffering from self-doubt.  I'm about 47,000 words into the book (having to estimate, because I haven't finished typing up what I've currently written)and it's about halfway through - well, perhaps it might just scrape past 85,000 words.  "Besotted" was a behemoth of a book, almost 130,000 words long.  I don't think "Maggie's Children" needs to be such a thick novel.

The thing is, writing this book is emotionally draining.  Whilst I'm not "becoming" Saul Castle in the same way as I virtually became Benjamin Beerenwinkel, the subject matter is depressing.  I'm hoping that, like some people's real depression, the mood will sink low, and then be followed by a euphoria as the book reaches its climax.  Or will it?  See, I haven't really got an ending for the book.  Not yet.  I know what's happened in Saul Castle's history, but I don't know what will happen to him in the future.

I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

Well, if I can stop being lazy ...